My saying yes, was in someways making me vulnerable to people and situation I didn't not want to be a part of. I wasn't ready to let anyone make me do things I didn't want to, one day I decided that it is okay that I lose out on people and situations, may be I do but at least I won't have to live with having done something I had no intention of doing anyway.
Again, it's always easier to say no to the big things. It's the little things that sap your energy that require saying no to. There's something more important than saying no to people, there is something called saying no to yourself. Telling yourself that something need not be done. You aren't obligated to do them.
Things I've said no to
- Depending on people to determine my happiness; I'm people centric. But i realized that people can make you happy only if you allow them to. Happiness is a state of mind, one that you have some control over. I refuse to let people make me sad. Make me happy? of course they're welcome.
- I said no to eating Maggi. 5 months and counting. It's not healthy. It's not.
- I said no to leaving books half way. I read all the time, but I have a terrible habit of leaving books half way and getting distracted by other books. I said no to that.
- I said no to being put into a corner. I will stand up and I will not back down. I might do a terrible job at standing up, but I wont go down without a fight.
- No to weight gain. I started skipping. I don't "need" to be in shape, I want to be shape. I want to skip the rope.
- I said no to trying to be it all and do it all. Nope. Not happening. Perfection can wait for when I'm dead and gone.
- I said no to compromise on what I believe in. I will not compromise on what I believe even if it screws me over. Which it has.
- I said no to unnecessary drama. Zero interference in people's personal life.My personal philosophy on this front is to never ask that which is not told.
- I said no to plans that I know won't unfold. It's not being pessimistic. It's being realistic; it is wrong to say I'll do something I cannot do. I'd rather tell you now that a holiday in Goa is out of question in May than play along to see where it goes.
- I said no to being busy. I've played the busy card one too many times and I've been on the I'm busy end of things. I realised that if I continued being 'busy'. I'd ruin every relationship I've nurtured so far. Having said that I've said no to being available. No, it's not a bad thing. You need to find your own time. for me it is 2 in the night, for someone else it may be 10 in the morning. Stop being 'available'. You need to be available to yourself. It's the only rational thing to do.