Saturday, December 1, 2012

Silence is a healer

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

Most people who are too quiet are either too engrossed in their own heads trying to figure out their lives or have nothing to talk about. But silence is different, it is a voluntary choice to keep quiet. Silence is self imposed. Silence lets you take a moment and reconsider our actions. On the crazy fast paced lives that we lead our minds deserve some quiet time.

She fought with him again! She just couldn't take in anymore, she was done being a victim of the endless apologies and the nonsensical sweet talk that followed. This time, was the last. She told herself that a lot of times, but these fights would get ugly and then the sweetness followed. So she picked up her bags and left. 
She headed to her own house, it was late, she hadn't cleaned in months, she simply let all of that go and put a pot of steaming tea on the stove and picked a book up realizing she hadn't read in ages, she headed out to the balcony with a her steaming cup of tea (her comfort drink) and book and she stood there, simply taking in the view the sun setting over the bridge, the birds returning home, the trees turning a shade of black, it was like the world was telling her she needed to go back home, she needed to sleep. But she continued to stare deep into the sunset reconsidering her entire life. Wondering if all this sacrifice was worth it.

She wondered if she was unhappy with him or herself? These fights, they had a pattern. The moment their jobs got a little difficult the fights got uglier. It was a lifestyle choice, both of them had job related stuff to deal with and then they had each other to vent out at.At some twisted level their fights made sense she thought. She was on her own for a few hours now and she genuinely missed being around him. It was not a case of new found love, it was not that it was waning away. She realised the hilarity of the situation, she needed that crazy venting out, she could not take the lovey-dovey for too long. She thought of it as unnatural. But she was done losing battles as well. She was stuck! The need to pick up the phone and apologise was much but she knew that it was a reaction, so against all will she decided to figure out something about this relationship, herself and everything else. 

No sooner her phone rang and as expected it was him. 

Some time on the phone and both of them knew what was happening. It was going away. They were yelling again. They were probably done. But with a stroke of genius she suggested that they deal with the issue 72 hours later. The fight was not over or may be it was and thankfully nobody won it. She smiled at the outcome, she had not lost or won this bout. 

She wanted to rethink everything, every conversation, her reaction. She wanted to be extremely real about this, she wanted to analyse herself as practically as possible and this would happen if she calmed down.  She needed to keep quiet, she needed to rethink.

And  3 days had passed while day one was torturous, she was angry, she felt horrified, the hurt was too much so was the guilt. She wanted to smash crockery, she wanted to burn his house down and the idea did give her some comfort. But by day two she had moved away from the idea, she knew that these fights were at some level keeping her emotions in check. The fights were making sure that her tear ducts were working. and by day 3 she had a plan. She invited him over and it looked like he had done some thinking too. 

The conversation seemed slow but back and within a few minutes it was back to normal, they were talking. About everything. The fight, the last 3 days the anger, the guilt, the remorse and everything. They realised that their problem was that they were simply reacting to small issues issues that could be over looked. His attention to detail and him overlooking things of importance were his issues. She simply needed to understand that he wasnt like normal people, he was complex and weird. Her expectation that he be outspoken about everything was unreal. Her understanding of his world was slightly skewed. They weren't just any couple. They were Sheldon and Amy! 

That is exactly why  he drew up the relationship agreement and they lived happily ever after! 

#In a parallel universe that is exactly how relationships work#


  1. amazingly written,,last part was good!
    keep writting :)

  2. Aswathy! Thank you soo much! :D


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