I was deeply touched by the idea of “Love is all accepting " On more thought I realised that the love –is all accepting, how far is this true? Love probably helps you to some extent to accept the pain caused, but love of a person or thing is reduced by the happening of certain events, how do say love accepts betrayal, betrayal simply scars the ability to love, similarly with jealousy. Lets look at it from a non filmy, non Hollywood/bollywood perspective. My mother truly loves me! And God knows she does, she has never once said its ok, after I have hurt her feelings, she has however always said ok, after I apologised. In a sense regret or genuine guilt help one realise love and sustain it.
Coming to think of it love does not accept everything, what truly nourishes love and makes the idea of the said event bearable is not the ability to love, but the ability to look past it and seek the love it hides within the regret. If love bore all, it would simply stagnate to tolerance... isn’t it?
Coming to think of it, love I feel is overrated, it is not a separate phenomenon is it? Love is omnipotent, you feel it with the company of friends, family and animals or things! ‘Love bears all’ I cannot really debate the topic because heart of hearts I want to simply buy the idea, but I know its not the case. ‘love does not accept being walked upon, love does not accept losing identity, love does not bear cheating, love sometimes, does not stand (sadly) the test of time. Love simply grows, flourishes and just like any other feeling runs its course. How do people in love then sustain 50 –70 years of marriage you may ask... well to answer that, many things contribute to that, respect.. acceptance, irreplacebleness of the relationship make you stick through the relationship, ofcourse sometimes it’s just fear of letting go, hurt, fear of getting looked down upon or just having a stronger reason to stay. Although I would still think of love as all powerful, I would like to think of love as subject to change, discretion and most importantly judgement. Love helps accept all of the people’s idiosyncrasies and craziness but not a persons short falls, like his ability to stay loyal. No! Love cannot overlook that. Sincere guilt helps may be overcome the fault and sail through tough times but definitely does not leave a person without scarring. Do you really believe a mother who is slapped by her own son will love the son without her love for him taking a beating? Well a mothers love may be the epitome of love but her being hurt will take time to heal. Do you think a cheating husband will ever get the same reverence he got from his wife the day they were married? They may... again after a serious healing, but definitely without the same intensity. Love is and forever will be as delicate an object although tough like glass is as likely to break, may be sometimes be recycled or rejoined but you know its not the same! Love thus does not bear all, love helps one bear all, till it becomes unbearable, love does not end, love simply ceases to exist... sometimes replaced by bitterness, sometimes by guilt, sometimes by experience and sometimes by a different person.