Thursday, April 7, 2016

A family that phones together, stays together #AtoZChallenge

Call it what you may, one of the only things I didn't worry about was about my family back in India. I know it sounds shocking, what kind of a person moving so far away not worry about their family? I wasn't worried about keeping in touch, or the effort it will take to stay in touch. I was willing to do it all.  For me, it was simple. I knew my love for family is not going to be put through a test; families don't test you. They accept. I've grown up with a lovely family and I've been married into one. Both my families being so utterly loving the thought of a strain on the relationship didn't even occur to me.

I'm a family and friends person, I absolutely love my parents and grandparents and sisters and brothers and aunts and uncles and friends. When I got married, the list of people I love just doubled.  I remember the first few days, I used to fall asleep randomly, wake up and dial my mother's number and talk to her. Slowly, I developed a schedule. I would call her around my 11 AM - Her 9.30 PM and again in the evening - her early morning and whether I had very little to tell her or nothing to tell her at all,I'd talk to her for almost an hour. It was as if she was with me.

I'd call my other set of parents during the day around the same time and repeat all the information to them as well. I'd discuss recipes with my mother in law or tease my father in law (no joke, I did. I told you I married into a fun family). I'd developed a sort of schedule of talking to people. I learned a weird thing, distances really don't matter.  Half way across the world and I was still yearning the company of familiar faces. It wasn't as much homesickness, I've lived away before. I was going about my normal schedule, I was heading out, enjoying my hobbies and living in up. There would be a one off day, where the cold outside would get to me, it would get all bleak and I'd wonder how far away I am. In times like those, I looked at the one familiar face that was sitting in front of me, explaining - tractive effort, or explaining some physics thingy. The idea of who family is really begins to sink in  when you realise that the person you're living with is essentially completely different from you, a stranger; one you hadn't known for a very long time. Families are weird, they are not essentially blood, they are not legal paperwork, they are not people on your will, families are not people you share an internet plan with. They are just them, kind souls who've accepted you.  They have no reason to be involved with you and yet they are deeply invested in you. In your comforts and your life.


When I think of Erie, I keep thinking of how a family deals with distance like it doesn't matter. How friendships survive. How life changed and yet remained absolutely unchanged when it came to relationships.

    

12 comments:

  1. I moved to a new continent, and you're right, as long as you can talk to your loved ones when you want, the distance doesn't factor in too often. I hope you are enjoying the A to Z!
    @ScarlettBraden from
    Frankly Scarlett

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  2. It is great that you can have fun and talk to your family even the extended family. Great Blog
    I hope you're enjoying the A to Z.
    @ScarlettBraden from
    Frankly Scarlett

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  3. Well said, Maggie. I stay away from my best friends and my parents and parents get a call daily thrice and friends anytime. The distance doesn't matter.

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  4. I don't like talking over the phone, unless it's an absolute necessity. But I guess when you're staying away from your parents, talking via telephone becomes a necessity? :)
    Loving the posts, Maggie. Keep them going :)

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  5. That's so beautiful! Stay happy and blessed!
    @yenforblue from
    Spice of Life!

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  6. Good one choice.
    Yes a family that phones together stays happy .
    ☺☺

    @dixita011 from
    Cafenined words

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  7. I literally never use the phone,Sometimes I call my mother on the way to work because she’ll be happy to chitty chat. But I just can’t think of anyone else who’d want to talk to me. Of course, immediate family members still phone occasionally. “It’s useful for catching up on issues.

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  8. Hi Maggie, that was beautifully put. Family is the only set of folks that accept you despite your flaws and all. I have a similar routine of phone-talk, more with Mum and less with second Mum....it happens as time flies, though it was not always so!
    Its important we keep our little circle of love tied together, at least by phone calls.
    @KalaRavi16 from
    Relax-N-Rave

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  9. Calling up parents and talking to them everyday is the best thing ever when you are away. For me those are the best moments of the day.

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  10. Loved this heartwarming post for a million reasons, but the one line that's going to stay with me for a long time is, "Families are weird, they are not essentially blood, they are not legal paperwork, they are not people on your will, families are not people you share an internet plan with."

    Very wonderfully written Maggie. Loving every article of yours :)

    My Era @theerailivedin
    The Era I Lived In

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  11. I signed up for separation and living apart when I got married to an Army Officer- both from him and my parents. :) Phone calls are the only solace.

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  12. aha staying away from home and making calls and discussing stuff all over the phone without bothering about time is such a unexplained feeling, I been through this on numerous occasion and cant get enough of it.

    Karan - Fearful

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