the weird place

i am here in a place in life where i wish i could trade a few moments to go back in time and relive what i may have missed out with the ones i really love, i cannot being by explaining how much i dread what is happening to me right now, im far away from home, sitting as my thoughts wander away to a place far far away.... if only i could trade places and be there... with the ones i really love... 20 years the fear of losing the ones i love has hogged me... initially it wasnt fear of losing them, as much as getting lost, coming to think of it... even now i stand to be lost and losing.... innocence covered most of my fears as a kid, but as grew up, my fear of losing people overpowers the fear of living with them, i cannot imagine living with people who are such an integral part of my life i cannot begin to explain.... i may be at times been mean to them... sometimes shoved them away, but not once did i think i'd live in the fear to losing them... and here i am far far away............