The Anne-Liesel Parallel; Divided in history, United by books.

“What do these children do without story books?" Naftali asked. And Reb Zebulun replied: "They have to make do. Storybooks aren't bread. You can live without them.""I couldn't live without them." Naftali said.”

-Isaac Bashevis Singer 

Often there comes a book that stays, stays in way that it crawls under your skin and flows through your veins, you wake up wondering if you had somehow managed to travel back in time and relive a certain part of a not so far away past. I came across Anne Frank's Diary when I was in school and I've read it a few times after. Each time I had a mix of goosebumps, tears, fear and hope. Roll ahead a few more years this brilliant book made it's way to my life; The Book Thief. 

The plot of the book thief is about a little girl Liesel who steals books and reads them, the timing of the occurrence is during world war II, Luckily (and I use this word very loosely) Liesel is German, the possibility of her ending up in a gas chamber are low... The book revolves around various complexities of her life. The book deals with love, relationships, loss, hope and recovery.. more importantly it deals with books. The love she feels for them and how she directs all of her tiny self towards books, how they fill her with happiness. Now there isn't anything about a book that a book lover will not relate to, the excitement, the joy, the hope it gives you, the faith it restores. Why this book makes you want to keep flipping through the pages is not just the love for books but the dire situations that makes you respect this little girl.

I remember when I first read Anne Frank, I was amazed that someone would even consider reading and education when there is such a war outside,I thought the thing to do when a sense of impending doom lurks around the corner was probably to curl up in a tiny corner and wait for death or something. I am not proud that I thought so, but at that time I actually thought it was impossible to imagine something as normal as reading when there was a war at your doorstep. I began to wonder how Frank wrote about such everyday instances, how she brought herself to write about her future, I wonder how she wrote so easily about normal things, the diary is not a war diary, it simply is the diary of a little girl in the times of war. She talks about love too, she talks about her learning, how she hopes to go back.

As I was reading the Book Thief, I swear I had goosebumps, I had tears and I was overwhelmed. I was deeply touched. But throughout I could think of Anne Frank, I could not take the image out of my mind. Two girls, same place, same age, one in hiding, the other one helping someone hide, one had Peter, the other had Rudy, both have parents, both struggling to make ends meet. It gave me chills to think that the only real difference was that one was German, the other was Jew. War has it tough for everyone. Both Liesel and Anne are testament that nothing about a war is pretty. People die. Enemies, friends, families. There is no winning side. 

A deep connection however was in the fact that both Anne and Liesel found comfort in books. When people ask why I read I think this is pretty much why. Of course, I sit in my comfortable little chair when I say I read because ____________ but the point is, when despair strikes like a hammer at a gong what do you do?? Liesel and Anne are little girls who have very little control over anything that is happening around them. What do you do other than trying to be okay about everything? When I think of Liesel going about her business reading books in the middle of the night and Anne gazing up at the sky in the middle of the night, writing in her book hoping to be free soon, what gives them the courage to dream? It was those scraps of paper and printed ink. It gave them some sense of control, it gave them something to hang on to. Their books made them feel normal. When everything else was going to hell, their books were the only 'regular' thing from their previous lives, perhaps. 

I can only think of what must be going on in the minds of these kids. What they must be thinking? But I guess the universal appeal for books in lies in the fact that books give you an alternate reality, the occupy your senses, they take you away, even briefly, away from that attic, away from Mulching, away from death, doom. Books give you a shoulder to lean on. I say this from my personal experience, in world filled with noise, a book is the only steady companion. Books fill a void inside you. You don't read a book because you read a book. You read a book because it lets you leave. Go away.It is not on some whim that books have been around for so long. I can imagine how depressed I would be if I didn't read. We have our lives to deal with; that's not going away. But in our darkest hours when we want to leave, even for a moment, we let books do that for us. 

We need to find normalcy in our scattered living we call life. Of course there is hopelessness, there is injustice, the is anger...  Books contribute to filling us up intellectually, philosophically even but more importantly, books fill us up emotionally.
How nice it would be if we could just forget that. Just for a few minutes.

PS: I think The Book Thief and Anne Frank's Diary are too beautiful to be written about. As for a review, I wouldn't even attempt it. :)

PPS: I know Liesel is a fictional character, but to me she is very real.  

Book Girl has problems too!

I will read absolutely everything. I mean I have my choices, genres and everything, but I've read enough to call myself an avid reader. I will also go on to call myself the book collector, I've successfully managed to collect more books than what I will read this whole year. (I could say life, but lets not say bad things) I have a group of friends who I talk books to. I redirect every conversation to books or coffee because those are the only thing I really know how to talk about. I know all the right things to say, I know what to exaggerate and what to simply let slide by. However, I'm shit at conversations that are about movies because I've haven't watched enough of them. I'm not too proud of it, but seriously, I cannot discuss movies, maybe I can discuss dialogue, script or plot but that essentially comes down to 'the story'.

Here is a compilation of the TOP 10 problems I face as a book collecting nerd!

1)Every conversation begins at "What have you read recently?" the answer better be something new because otherwise, I'm stuck. How do I proceed. What do I say? I have no interest in people's lunches and dinners and sleeps. I can ask you if you've had dinner, but I almost never mean to ask that as a question. It's generally to ask you if you are well fed and can obsess with me over books without any interruption.

2) I have more books than I can read, I know this. I know I'm going to keep buying books, I know it's going to be tough to say this out loud, but I'm never going to read all the books I've bought. It's come to the point where I've accepted it. I've accepted that I buy books out of a certain compulsion and I can't do anything about. 

3)I feel like an outcast I almost never fit in a non book lovers type setup. I cannot go out shopping and have a good time with the buddies if it does not involve at least some element of talking books. I cannot hang out with so many wonderful, kind people only because I have the social skills of a squid. The only thing I can talk is books, food, some politics and something anything that I've read online. All my opinions come from things I've read. If I haven't read about it, it isn't on my mind. I have no TVing skills either. I cannot talk reality TV, Daily soaps and stuff. I can mock them, but that isn't what people are generally looking for so it's tough for me. This is not to say that I don't have non book lover friends, I have lots of them but small talk isn't what I'm known for with them :)

4)I have very very funny ideas about love, life and just generally everything. Books have ruined reality for me. Majorly. Everything I say or do feels like it is inspired by a damn book. I've picked up swear words to "sweet nothings" from a lot of books. Friendships feel right if it feels like they could have been written about. I often think of my friends and wonder if it would make a great story to tell. Thankfully, so far all of them are a yes! 

5) I have a soft spot for people who read, I will let them get away with almost anything. If you say you read and you've read something I will like you. If you didn't answer my call because you were reading or writing. I will probably let you go. My kids better not know about this. God help me trying to be a stern mother and having a soft spot for reading kids. Speaking of whom, I am very scared that the next generation isn't going to read at all. I know it's not my decision to tell kids to read and I'm all for making free choices but it would break my heart if my kids, my cousins' kids or my friends kids didn't read. 

6)I never have never walked out of a bookstore without buying a books. That's truly dangerous, I have to make a very conscious effort to not buy books. I have to hold back myself, come up with stupid excuses and everything. I've made buying books an activity for life. I have money stashed away just so I can books. My first bank account when I was 15 was only to save up enough money to buy the Harry Potter box set. Of course, I didn't buy the box set; my parents would never let me spend from my bank account because what little girl spends from her money when her parents are more than happy to give her extra pocket money just to buy books! :D

7) I almost always end up getting up late, except for a Sunday. Sunday's are for looking at pretty books and reading them. Every weekday is tedious, waking up every single day is hard work because the concept of time fails me when I'm reading. It's 7 in the evening, soon it's dinner and what feels like a few minutes later, its 3AM. Good luck waking up after a 3 hour nap and trying to work!I spend a good number of days in a zombie like state. Of course it helps me keep a lot of BS at bay.

8)I've never been comfortable with travelling without a book, even if I have no time to read on the trip. I've been on enough trips where I've never had the time to read. Even when I know that the trip is going to be super tiring, super long, I have to carry a book. Which is why I started exploring writers who write tiny books, at least it became  little comfortable to carry.

9) I have tear stained books, I have pages that have yellowed slightly from when I sat and cried over them. I'm forever attached to those books because it feels like I've left a very very real part of me is in those pages. I cannot look at the page when Cedric dies and be okay. Everything I felt then comes flooding back to me. I reel under that hurt for days. I feel bad for Cedric. (Thankfully, I look at the twilight memes and feel better about RPatt)

10) I cannot stand noise! My life revolves around buying and reading and talking about books. While that's awesome. It takes a toll on me personally, it's difficult to explain what I do to people. I have to find words to describe my obsession, my love for books. I get sad and upset when people don't share my obsession. Well, I'm not really upset about them sharing my obsession as much as it upsets me when they look down upon my reading. No, I don't go out partying, my idea of fun does not involve me leaving my books at home and going really far away all dressed up because I know I'm better off at home. When people say I'm probably depressed because I like staying holed up in my room and read, I want to scream to their face and say I feel incredibly lonely in all that noise. I am better off not having a "life" at home where I'm more comfortable with the silence than I am outside. But most days I just smile and say 'You know me'. When what I really mean is that they really don't know me and shouldn't bother to decode me.

When it comes to going out with people My question is simple 'Will there be a quiet place I can read in?' If the answer is yes! I'm in. Otherwise, bye bye! Also, I'm not all boring I'm all for the idea of having fun outside of books but Tell me something actually fun that doesn't involve  noise. (Basically somewhere I can open my book if I'm too bored)

Writing -Bits from my lil red book

"You Never have to change anything you got up in the middle of the night to write."

-Saul Bellow

I read this quote and instantly I was awake. It is late in the night and as usual I am sitting and reading through things people say about writing, reading and books. (guilty pleasures). Yes! and I came across this quote and it fit, I picked my little red book and started writing.

I realised how every writer right from a Oscar Wilde to an amateur one feels the same kind of things about their writing. Nobody is looking to sell a million copies. Great writers are not churning out books because they want to sell, they are writing because they want to write, they want to be read.

Writers want to escape from whatever they are seeing and they want to write about it. They want to scream from rooftops about what they feel. Every writer sees something 'tell-able' all the time.

I feel most writers start with the process of wanting to write something different, change their style perhaps, but eventually it gets too much, they have to comeback to their element. It feels like an experiment at best. People who write humour stick to that, people who write crime stick to that. It feels right.

Writers are obsessed with writing something that will change the way the world works. They don't have to have to be the greatest ever, they just believe that everything they are writing is just going to be mind boggling and sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't.

Writers love drama, they can write fiction or non fiction. The soul of the story is highly dramatic, writers see their life and everything around them in HD (High Drama) The glorification is amazing, the exaggerations are pretty unbelievable,  the emotions are on the brim, a writer is never devoid of emotions.  

A writer wants people to identify with the character. They will write twisted characters, very complex and yet beautifully incorporate some emotion because of which every everybody  identifies with the character.

Most often writers don't care about genders, I love that most writers write male and female characters who can very easily be interchanged and the story would still remain the same.These characters can be identified with by people of any or both or either genders.

Writers see beauty in everything, everything they see they want to write something amazing about it, most of the times it is difficult to write about everything and still there is parallel script that is running in their head. Some of it sees the light of the say some of it fizzles out, but people who write generally want to talk about everything.

Writers are romantics! Writers want to write a world where everything somehow sorts itself out for better or worse. They want to see a solution, they want an end. They want their characters to find some closure. 

They love their characters, good, bad or ugly they love their characters and want only good things to happen to them. 

The hate mail.

NOTE:THIS IS NOT AN ACTUAL LETTER. PLEASE READ ENTIRELY BEFORE JUDGING ME. 

Dear Maggie.

I don’t hate you, in fact I love you too much. It was over the day you moved on. I knew it.  I was old news, I was out and somebody else was in.  You put me away; you crossed me off a list. You are a mean person. Don’t you feel a pang of pain and guilt before you move on? You dumped me. Maggie, I was everything you were looking for I was funny, adventurous, brave, committed, and knowledgeable, I had class, I have never once wanted to be somewhere else but with you and yet, you walk away from me.

Do you forget those Oh My God moments? Those moments when you were awestruck, you were beyond impressed with me. You thanked God that I was in your life. You forget all those laughing riots we had? I cracked you up all the time. Forget laughs do you remember the tears we shed together? We were sad together, you were inconsolable and yet, I managed to say something just to see you relieved. Does all of it mean nothing at all? You keep bragging about your newer conquests, the more challenging ones, the easy ones. I know some you hate and some you love, but do you see that you have left me all alone?   

You discuss your newer conquests like Casanova would, you drama queen! I hate you for thinking that you can move on, I know I have changed you and I will draw pleasure from that fact. Yes! I have made you look at things differently, I have scared you of something’s and I will take those things with me till the end. I know I am being brutal here, but isn’t that true? Haven’t you become better or worse because of me?

Every time I catch your scent, I wish you would pick me, wander in my direction, but no! You go to some newer better looking one. These new ones hold promise, do they? Remember I was one of them as well. I know you talk of me sometimes, but you mostly tell others that you been there. You talk of how I was. I don’t want that. I will find those people myself and you don’t need to find me more people.

I know our relationship was short, but it was no fling. It was real. I gave myself to you, I was committed to the cause and you left me. I have seen you gone back to a few others from the past and I am hopeful, I wish you came back to me and yet I can only be hopeful. I am lonely. I miss the times we spent cuddled up on a winters morning or on a lazy Sunday afternoon, you took off from work just to meet me.  I miss those meaningful conversations we had, some that lasted for hours on end.

Maggie, you were never ashamed of me, you wanted to parade me around, you held me in public and now I am just somebody?

In all this bitterness and resentment I feel towards you, I know if you came back to me today, I would happily accept you. I will not question your intent. I would be yours again.

John Green is a genius!!

Regards,

Your Old book!

My version of heaven!

Yes! While I am not exactly a believer of Heaven and Hell. I have however come to understand that there has to be a better place than this and we have to go there. It is my last hope. For putting up with the shit we do, for suffering each day, it is like being punished, so I believe that THIS is Hell and so as a consequence we will go to a better place. Pure hell does not have to be hot and fiery, the earth is a good enough place to be called hell, with the kind of life we lead, the people we deal with that all that. It is actually hilarious that people expect a worse place. But yes! We are free to imagine a better place.

So Dear Whoever Controls Heaven,

On the off chance that I get there (I am not immortal) I would like to present a version of heaven I like. No bright lights please. Absolutely no harps, dancers or music. You see I have an innate fear choreographed performances and loud music. Also, I am clearly influenced by the TV version of Heaven. Blame the upbringing, God! Also with reference to the music, the music will be genre based music. It would be really weird to hate the music in Heaven! There is no other place to go after that. Is there?

Other than that Dear Heaven controller type person must know that my version of the heaven is a little cold, I mean not freezing, but you know just like winters here. I wish there is a huge cackling fire and an eternal fountain of Chocolate and coffee. Please let the coffee be  bitter and the chocolate dark!

I love the idea of Utopia and what version of my heaven is complete without ladders? Ofcourse I will need ladders because there will be millions of books and eternity to read them! *You did not see that coming?*  My idea of heaven is a little skewed but you get it, no? But WTH! (Heaven)  No bright lights, just warm yellows, dingy, dusty even.and mostly quiet.

My inspiration for the post

I am given to understand that people in heaven wear all whites, but please can I come in my pajamas? Or jeans or shorts? Eternity in whites just sounds difficult. I will wear the same jeans forever. So my clothes and books are covered and so is my food. Since I can't die again i would like to get some junk food? Okay, I am being a little materialistic here... but but... You know how this is the "Happiest place"

I get that there are concerns about being indoors all the time, so can I please get me a beach? Lots of sunlight, no rains? also no rain forests for me. I can make peace with the no beaches. I would like for it rain indoors. And when it rains, I would like if there was a scrabble club of some sort. It would be amazing!

Finally it will have to have internet! super fast internet!! :)

Sputnik Sweetheart -Quotable Stuff

Some quotes really talk to me. And one book that did after a very long time was the Sputnik Sweetheart. I will write a review later. But before I forget these quotes i want to write them down. May be sometime, explain them as well.



“Instead of things I’m good at, it might be faster to list the
things I can’t do. I can’t cook or clean the house. My room’s a
mess, and I’m always losing things. I love music, but I can’t
sing a note. I’m clumsy and can barely sew a stitch. My sense of
direction is the pits, and I can’t tell left from right half the time.
When I get angry, I tend to break things. Plates and pencils,
alarm clocks. Later on I regret it, but at the time I can’t help
myself. I have no money in the bank. I’m bashful for no reason,
and I have hardly any friends to speak of.”
Sumire took a quick breath and forged ahead.



We used to spend hours talking. We never got tired of
talking, never ran out of topics—novels, the world, scenery,
language. Our conversations were more open and intimate
than any lovers’.

“The thought hits me a lot these days that maybe my novelwriting
days are over. The world’s crawling with stupid,
innocent girls, and I’m just one of them, self-consciously
chasing after dreams that’ll never come true. I should shut the
piano lid and come down off the stage. Before it’s too late.”

Do you know what ‘Sputnik’ means in
Russian? ‘Travelling companion’. I looked it up in a dictionary
not long ago. Kind of a strange coincidence if you think about
it. I wonder why the Russians gave their satellite that strange
name. It’s just a poor little lump of metal, spinning around the
Earth.”

And it came to me then. That we were wonderful travelling
companions, but in the end no more than lonely lumps of metal
on their own separate orbits. From far off they look like
beautiful shooting stars, but in reality they’re nothing more
than prisons, where each of us is locked up alone, going
nowhere. When the orbits of these two satellites of ours
happened to cross paths, we could be together. Maybe even
open our hearts to each other. But that was only for the briefest
moment. In the next instant we’d be in absolute solitude. Until
we burned up and became nothing.”

The story of why i need to scribble :)

Here is a rather small reasons of why i 'need' to write.

Writing is more than a passion, it is an escape. I begin wondering why I even started writing, and I am constantly led to the fact that everyone in the family has been a good with words (yes! grandparents and all). I feel like it must be them, however I don't think my writing has genetic origins, so I have been thinking of the reasons I feel reading or writing

1 ) Its an escape :The world is full of shit! My life feels like it sucks... but a book gives me hope, it fills me with a weird sunshine sorta thing.  I see that life will get better 

2) I write and read to keep myself "literate" :I believe that one must keep atleast his literacy alive and not by reading sign posts. Writing is a great outlet to use my education, its not like education helps any other way. ;)

3) I write and read to help myself  : I need to write to tell myself I'm doing something that is important to myself, I have something and I have an opinion and I have a platform, I could not have asked for more. I think i should use it.

4) I write and read to have great conversations : I have met people like me, I have had fun conversation with them the only reason being that I write/read and them too. It draws attention away from the gossip, the "outer" self image and all that. It sounds selfish, but yes, I think when people have an hobby, it makes life better because they understand why you are passionate, crazy and hopefully connect to you.

5) I write and read to keep myself sane :The insanity in a book engrosses you to the extent that you come to terms with your own insanity and make peace with it.

6) I write and read to keep my imagination alive : I believe that when you read and write, it gives your imagination wings, and beautiful wings! . In a world so lack lustre,I get to read somebody elses life that I am inspired by.

7) I live by the quote "you can't make all the mistakes yourself so you learn from others" : Reading gets me to see that in the characters and extend the same to the people I meet. I don't have to become a Harry Potter or Hermione Granger to know that kindness and bravery can take you a long way!

8) I get to add traits to my personality : when you read, you draw from the book (very subconsciously). I became the cold(awesome) in-your-face Howard Roark... ofcourse I was threatened  to give it up or been thrown out off class! But Roark lives in me.. :P

9) I  am not a better judge of a person, infact a book tells you never to judge : Everybody  has a back story, I don't feel like judging because I get it. It is difficult to comply and fit in, when you actually don't.

10) It gives me better things to invest my time in :There are issues in the world and yes one must be interested them. A article or book that speaks about an issue or a great life makes you want to do something spectacular with yourself. Its a big thing! If a book can push you towards being a good person or atleast make you have the desire to become a nice person, its a job well done.

11) Most importantly reading gives me a sense of humour : A person without a sense of humour draws pity from me... I feel sorry for people who cannot laugh or see the beauty of the laughing. A book presents me with ample laughter sometimes with joy, sometimes with sadistic pleasure and sometimes simply because of its simplicity.

This post is about reading and writing... I think both of them in my case can be used interchangeably considering that I love writing as much as i like to read... and writing does the same things as reading (to me)